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Word from the OC ROV is that recent council election show horse Doug Chaffee has given up the ghost in his recount against place horse Pat McPension.
It was a forlorn hope to begin with but Chaffee wanted to give it that one last shot. He’ll be trying out for the Dodgers in the spring.
Of course OCs RINO elite is pleased as punch and God bless ’em. It’s been a tough 14 months.
Holy Unadulterated Avatar of Octogenarian Jebus! Just check out these wonderful political signs! 2010 was a fun year for creative signage and if you don’t believe that, here are our nominees:
1. Bad Chi. Was there a better way to convey the sheer barfiness of food-poisoner Roland Chi? Nuh, uh. This sign symbolized the very essence de Chi. And in the international symbol that not even a non-English speaker could mistake.
2. Huh? This baby homemade sign with stick-on letters might have been engaging if anybody could read it and if they could figure out what in the hell it meant!
3. The Classic. Nothing succeeds like success, and the classic “NO “fill in the blank” Carpetbagger has become a standard – just like a Sinatra ballad. Doo-be-doo-be-doo.
4. The Riff. Union puppet. Effective but ultimately not even necessary.
5. Murder She Wrote! It might have been effective if not for the fact that the creator of these was the biggest job killer in Orange County!
6. The She Bear. Just play dead and maybe it will go away. The sign that launched a thousand thefts.
Well there you have it.
Oh, Ye Cruel Amethyst Plasticine Gods above! In a year full of wacky political campaigns this category just screams out “potential!”
Now, the Nominating Committee wasn’t interested in the typical collection of paid-to-blog courtesans that whore themselves as part of their quotidian life’s work: creeps like Dan Chomolungma and Matthew J. Cunningham. Oh, no no no!
This category embraces the brief shooting stars who, in their trajectories across the local political firmament, burn with an incandescent glow before vanishing into the irrelevance of lifelong mundane hackery. And by burn with an incandescent glow, I mean make utter jackasses out of themselves shamelessly bending over for cretinous political bosses. Here we find political ambition, lack of character, stupidity, and brainless tenacity sticking with people or ideals that weren’t worth sticking up for.
Motivation is not the sole factor in the category; comic spectacle is what we’re after, too.
And your nominees are:
1. Thomas Anthony Gordon. This econo-size chowderhead popped up on a local blog attacking Shawn Nelson for being a defense lawyer and therefore soft on crime. Which was funny because Gordo had had his own brushes with the law!
Since this goon lives in Santa Ana it wasn’t hard to surmise that he was working for somebody who had an interest in the 4th District campaign. At first we thought he was working for John Lewis and the Tom Daly Team. Well, maybe he was. But then he appeared as a petition circulator for Hairball Sidhu and we then knew whose payroll he was on.
Gordon even played victim card wackily claiming to have been intimidated by us for outing his tooling for Sidhu.
After we busted him for making anonymous comments on our blog he mercifully vanished from our radar screen.
2. Little Billy Turner. ‘Lil Billy popped up last February at a Fullerton Tea Party event passing out fliers for Hairbag Sidhu. Unfortunately he ran into Chris Thompson to whom he admitted that Sidhu was going to lose and noted that he had tried to get in touch with Shawn Nelson. Not knowing that his attempted double-cross in search of a winning candidate would end up as blog fodder he passed along his name and address to Thompson.
We had some more fun with Billy over at Sidhu’s empty campaign headquarters, too.
Later, we were told that Little Billy had been ensconced in Sidhu Fake Address #2 so that it would appear lived in. And we were informed that Little Billy had also turned into a sign thief. That sure seems in character.
It didn’t seem to have occurred to Little Billy that getting an honest job in one of Sidhu’s Pollo Locos would be more honorable than working for such a creep’s bogus scampaigns; but then given his own propensity for double-dealing, maybe part-time jobs in politics is the only kind of work he will ever have, or ever want. There will always be ‘pugs looking for cheap labor so Billy may find employment once every couple of years.
Oh, well. If working for Sidhu doesn’t scare you straight, nothing can.
3. 4SD Observer. This sad Grendel-like creature emerged in 2010 to defend the indefensible – the serial miscreance of Pam Keller. 4SD withstood a systematic dismembering from the regs, continually coming back for more. There was no hypocritical, stupid, lying, featherheaded thing that her Pam could say or do that could cause this devoted acolyte to cease soldiering on.
Hilariously, the series of quotations from The Manchurian Candidate by some of our Friends went zipping right over his/her head, every time. An irrational love for budget-busting public safety union members, hatred for Supervisor Shawn Nelson and a weird fixation on cooking harmless bunny rabbits sealed the deal.
In short, 4SD Observer was the quintessential intellectual face of the Keller years: sanctimonious, humorless, and confused; but mostly just brainwashed.
Enjoy this clumsy rhetorical diarrhoea on the part of our newly installed Mayor Pro Tem, Don Bankhead as he rationalizes excluding Sharon Quirk-Silva from the officer rotation. If you can figure out his weird justification for doing the wrong thing, and that we ought to return to a rotation (but not by him and not now), then God bless you.
Bankhead says he is tired of blah, blah, blah.
Newsflash, Blanky – we’re tired of crochety, semi-lucid ignoramuses representing the City of Fullerton. You got a pass this election but rest assured every idiocy that comes tumbling out of your mouth will be documented here.
In the world of politics endorsements are held to be a big deal. A long list is supposed to be impressive, no matter the character (or lack of same) of the people on the list. And in Orange County there are plenty of elected officials whose names you would be a lot better off without. This obvious fact seems to have escaped many politicos whose background research on some of their endorsers is often lacking.
Conversely, whom one chooses to endorse is also a true reflection of one’s moral or intellectual fiber and backing a crook, an idiot, or an ass clown can cause some embarrassment.
Anyhoo, here’s your list, with a little commentary added:
1. Brett Barbre. This embarrassing tool stole $48,000 of your money pretending to “study” an OC Sports Hall of Fame. He was aided and abetted by County Clerk Tom Daly whom he endorsed and to whom he contributed. But that’s not why he’s here.
2. Janet Nguyen. The semi-literate and wholly embarrassing County Supervisor whose communication skills are perfectly representative of her grasp of issues.
3. F. Richard Jones. Fullerton’s own crazy funny Doc Cracker Barrel, whose down home, lunatic ravings are only superseded by total ignorance of anything more complicated than a southern fried chicken wing.
4. Kurt Pringle. The pay-to-play, former Anaheim mayor for whom no string is to long or slack to pull. And man did he try to pull a slack string. Recently got busted by the AGs office for holding incompatible office, which he did for three years to promote his own client’s interests in Anaheim.
5. John Lewis. Former State Senator and chief OC repuglican who started out the 4th Supervisorial District race pimping out a Democrat. As a lobbyist you can bet that whomever he endorses will be expected to pay up, later.
6. CRA. The California Republican Assembly. A more worthless collection of losers and oddballs you will not find. Also, you can sign up as a member one month and vote to endorse your own family member the next! What a deal.
7. Chriss Street. The County’s outgoing Treasurer who was recently busted by a judge for ripping off a company placed in his trust. His behavior was so egregious that the Board of Supervisors stripped him of his investment authority. He also got caught dodging County procurement rules so as to remodel his offices without any oversight. He also tried to get folks to believe he has an MBA from Stanford. He doesn’t.
8. John S. Williams. Public Administrator/Guardian currently being investigated by the Board of Supervisors for malfeasance. He’s supposed to be taking care of people’s estates. Looks like he’s been taking care of his own estate.
9. Jeff Miller. State Assemblyman who was the recipient of Mike Duvall’s “open mike” chat and whose own dealings in an attempt to create a Corona public utility while on that city council had many Inland Emperors scratching their heads.
10. Gary Miller. Yet another repuglican slimer in the US Congress. Redevelopment pimp and whore for Big Ed Roski, the biggest Redevelopment free loader in the State of California.
11. Cynthia Coad. Former 4th District Supervisor and quite possibly the stupidest person in Orange County.
12. Richard Faher. Alleged “Placentia Taxpayer Advocate.” Now this guy’s just downright creepy, referring to himself in the third person. But his pathetic and weird clown-campaign brought one iridescent, shining jewel – the pronunciation of the 2nd District Supervisor’s name: John Moor-latch.
13. Rosie Espinosa. La Habra’s dim-witted councilmember whose grasp of policy ended with the use of her automatic garage door opener. Mean people likened her to a sack of rivets. Mean people were right.
14. Pam Keller. Fullerton’s outgoing council sweetheart, whose batting eye lashes and fake “I’m just a dumb girl” routine,…oh, wait. She is just a dumb girl.
15. Alexandria Coronado. This dim-witted queer-basher who claims to be a doctor finally got her reckoning last June after faking endorsements and was thrown off the OC Board of Education.
Well, there’s fifteen names to choose from, but really, the potential list is virtually endless; there seems to be a dumb Dem and a crooked ‘pug on virtually every street corner peddling his or her dubious wares.
Who is the worst of the worst? Stay tuned…
Oops! Looks like re-elected councilman Don Bankhead forgot to raise his right hand as he took the oath of office.
So what does that mean? Was he really and truly legally sworn in when he voted for the insufferable Doc HeeHaw as Mayor and himself as Mayor Pro Tem? Who knows?
But I know that I want to seem him do it right!
Bill Dannemeyer just lost an expensive appeal in an effort to compel you Fullerton taxpayers to pave a dirt alleyway that leads to the back of his property. Why? So that he can park his RV and boat behind his house.
“Who is Bill Dannemeyer?” some of you may well ask. Why, he used to be your esteemed Congresscritter there in F-town before the Little Corporal took over. He was a hard-line conservative who hated queers, and who got his start as – you guessed it – a public employee. A long, long time ago he was a City Attorney in Fullerton. In fact, he spent thirty years on the public dime.
You would think a former congressman, former city attorney and supposed “conservative” would be smart enough to avoid an evident legal morass caused by a selfish grab for public resources, or at least be able to present his case in plausible legalese. Boy would you be 180 wrong!
According to the appeals court that heard the case:
Dannemeyer’s opening brief is confusing and at times completely unintelligible. His brief has 22 separate argument headings, most of which are devoid of legal analysis, citation to relevant supporting legal authority, or cogent explanation as to how he was prejudiced by the claimed error
Cherry-flavored, glow-in-the-dark, radioactive Jebus! Who could have supposed that 2009 could have been topped when it came to really awful and horrific political candidates? But it was. By 2010. And it wasn’t even close.
2009 brought us the spectacle of Chris Norby running for County Clerk to preserve our birth certificates from the silverfish; and the hideous Linda Ackerwoman, an Irvine claim-jumper whose appalling repuglican candidacy for State Assembly resembled a jail break though a swamp more than a political campaign.
Well, Hell! They were just getting us warmed up.
In the category Worst Political Campaign 2010 we roll out the following rogues gallery of nominees:
1. “Hairball” Harry Sidhu. A bozo who is so damn stupid his first 4th District Supervisorial campaign move of 2010 was to pretend to live in a roach-infested apartment next to a pool hall in west Anaheim so he could qualify to run. Of course the “mainstream media,” the repuglican ass-kissers, and our do-nothin’ DA ignored this flagrant perjury. But we didn’t. From there on out it was all downhill for Hairbag, including a second fake address, inchoherent statements, more carpetbagging, embarrassing press releases, all around assclownery, and two humiliating defeats. Arf!
2. Lorri “Lorraine” Galloway. Another Anaheim Hills denizen who created at least three fake abodes (2 illegal) to run for the same seat as Sidhu. Her manifest idiocies, including the unintentionally hilarious “Lorri in 4th gear” video series (and the now world-wide youtube sensation “Poor Bella”) identified this brain-dead clothes horse as the utter lightweight she is. Her checkered past revealed all sorts of scams that would have made Elmer Gantry weep bitter tears of envy. Oh, Anaheim! I lift my leg on thee!
3. Roland Chi, a creep who by all appearances was run out of Garden Grove and took up shop in Fullerton. His disgusting grocery business was busted for serial health code violations in which numerous people were food-poisined, and he dodged prosecution by giving some of his precious bodily fluid to the DA. Meantime, in Fullerton he organized a political sign theft ring headed up by his own father, violated IRS rules by politically pimping a non-profit, and got a Korean church to illegally promote his campaign. Almost nobody was fooled by this sleazy slime-suck except the Fullerton Police and Fire Unions that recognized a kindred spirit, and that whole-heartedly endorsed his sleazoid scampaign.
Wow. What a year!
Well, that didn’t take long. In office as Mayor for a few scant days, Doc Jones issued his first diktat: a new sister city for Fullerton to join the ranks of Fukui and Morelia and Yongin.
The new destination for Fullerton international gladhanders is none other than Pilgur, principal metropolis of Kharakhastan. Of course Friends will recall that Jones’s ties to Kharakhastan run deep, and remember his reference in a diatribe against a former Congressman:
Then there was our subsequent research into this exotic corner of Central Asia.
When reached for comment on his unusual decision, Jones minced no words: “As a Airman Basic in the Air Force I oncet had to bail out over that place. And man, I’m telling ya, them gals was friendly! ‘Sides I ain’t partial to no squids and raw tuna ‘n suchlike, ‘n that cabbage slaw done give me some baaaad gas.”
And so for those of you who believed that Good Ol’ Boy Jones was jes’ gonna run out the clock, well, Hell y’all can guess again.
Friends, we just received this e-mail from one of our readers who calls him/herself “Disillusioned Ex-hippy.” We publish it verbatim, although the images are our contribution.
I have it on excellent authority that Pam Keller and her posse threw a going away party for themselves the other evening in which pity pots on which to sit were handed out at the door. I was invited but chose not to attend.
Well, I’m not sad. Good riddance. Keller accomplished next to nothing in her four year term. That’s why a lot of us are celebrating her departure – even many of us who supported her in 2006. In fact she turned her back on her promises to Fullerton about developers and their undue influence. That’s was just a big lie.
And BTW, Pam the meanie blogs aren’t the the cause of divisiveness in Fullerton. What is the cause of divisiveness is a city council that just ratifies the decisions put in front of it by the staff; a city council too lazy, too stupid, or too supine to think and act for itself – unless a weird, erratic outburst is called for.