Linda Ackerman Runs Away From GOP – Steps In Elephant-sized Pile

Oh, oh!
Oh, oh!

In what seems to be an increasingly desperate campaign, the Ackerwoman sent out a mailer to Democrats trying to woo their unlikely votes. Nothing all that unusual there. The only problem is she says that she “is not defined by being a Republican.”

Can someone please help take my shoes off?
Can someone please help take my shoes off?

Oh, oh. Seriously no bueno (as Art Pedroza would say) in some circles. See, Linda is a national GOP committeewoman and is a (seemingly permanent) fixture on the OC GOP central Committee. This has caused a bit of a stir, even at the Red County blog that heretofore had been treating the Ackerman, Inc. prevarications with kid gloves. Blogger Allan Bartlett has demanded Ackerwoman’s resignation from the national committee post haste.

So now Linda has to start scrapping off the bottom of her Gucci shoes, explaining to friend and foe alike just what that mailer really did mean. If she placates the Republicans, she’s sure to offend any Dems or DTS voters stupid enough to have fallen for the ruse in the first place.

O frabjous day! Callooh! Callay!

The Ackerman Anti-tax Pledge. What a Hurl

UPDATE: This post was previously published on October 18th. Our Friend Joe S. asked that we repost as a reminder that the Ackerman campaign is really built on nothing but hot air and bad intentions.
We received an e-mail from our long-time Friend, Joe Sipowicz, yesterday and decided to share it with you. It has Joe’s trademark frankness so please don’t get mad at us. We just pass it along as Joe sent it, with a couple of spelling corrections:


Sure, I'll sign anything.
Sure, I'll sign anything Dick tells me to. We're a team.

I came home from work the other day and brought in the mail. Among the rest of the junk was a Linda Ackerman campaign mailer. One side included some bullshit about how Norby voted to raise his Sanitation District stipend, something I had already read about: he didn’t actually cast a vote so we don’t even know if he was in the room. But the Ackermans just decided to say he voted for it. Throw it up, see if it sticks.

 The other side showed the Ackerman woman in her staged “experienced businesswoman” pose and costume – a blatant fraud already well debunked as a con by Grover Cleveland’s excellent posts.

But the best (worst) part of this flier was the little corner dedicated to a facsimile of some asinine “no tax pledge” signed by this woman. No new taxes. And a signature.

Then it hit me. What kind of a goddamned idiot would be impressed with this horse crap, and what kind of cynic would think they would be? Well, clearly this flier was meant to appeal to some brain-dead jackass who actually thinks a politician’s pledge is all that meaningful. And of course I understand that the Ackerman woman has no record on anything, and needs to make up stuff. So she signed some stupid piece of paper to see how many of the rubes would go for it.

Given that fact that the Ackerman “campaign” has been nothing but a load of lies from the beginning – residency, experience, etc. it’s hard to believe why anybody would take this lame-ass pledge seriously. 

And another thought: people like the Ackermans with their political money machines and their lobbyist enabled free trips to Hawaii know how to game anything in government – even signed “no tax” pledges. There are all kinds of ways to raise government revenue in Sacramento, the most obvious being the notorious “fee” increase, often nothing more than user taxes applied to government services or facilities that have already been paid for by the taxpayer. And raising these fees is just another way of raising general fund revenues through the back door – without actually “raising taxes.”

Well, the back door seems to be the place of preferred entry for the Ackermans: from Sacramento to Lindendale, in Fullerton; through which they must be sneaking in at night since nobody has seem them going through the front door of their rented address.

Facebook Funnies

I did it. So can you!

I did it. So can you!

Just because we had nothing better to do we took a cyber stroll through Linda Ackerman’s Facebook site and lookit what we turned up. Note the name: Carol Rudat, the erstwhile candidate for City of Orange City Council who was busted as a carpetbagger and narowly escaped having her candidacy tossed out by a judge. And now she and her husband Dave strongly endorse fellow carpetbagger Linda Ackerwoman! Too funny!

O, bitter irony! Matthew J. Cunningham had a veritable conniption over Rudat’s carpetbagging in Orange, but now looks the other way when the wife of El Commandante does it in the 72nd Assembly District race!

What a collection of miscreants.

72nd Assembly District Pre-ballot Mail-Out Recap: What We Know About Linda Ackerman

Isn't being a "proud grandmother" enough?
Isn't being a "proud grandmother" enough?

UPDATE: as absentee ballots roll in we thought it would be a useful public service to republish our run down about what we know about Linda Ackerman. If you haven’t voted please read, or read again. If you have already voted have fun reading it anyway. 

We’ve been reading up on our would-be 72nd Assembly District representative, Linda Ackerman, of Irvine. We’ve done some digging, too, and have perused her website. We have had quite a bit of fun shredding the supposed testimonials by endorsers, statements so false that they hardly needed debunking.

Now, with only a month (Ed. now three weeks) to go before the Special Election primary, and with absentee ballots soon to be landing in mailboxes we have decided to do a recap of the territory we have covered. Consider it a public service.

  • Linda Ackerman is a carpetbagger who has lived in a gated community in Irvine for ten years.
  • The Ackermans have “rented” a fraudulent address on Lindendale, in Fullerton to meet the minimum enforceable election law, even though it is a violation of the State Constitution.
  • Despite her campaign claims of being an “experienced businesswoman” she has provided no evidence to substantiate that claim. She does sit on the Board of a collection agency whose clients are organized as Sacramento lobbyists.
  • She created an operation called the Pacific Policy Research Foundation, a putative “charitable” corporation; a dodge whose sole purpose is to provide politicians a free trip to Hawaii to be lobbied by big business interests.
  • She has received at least two $3900 contributions from bogus political campaign “slush funds,” including that of her own husband.
  • She was paid $76,000 by her own husband’s campaign as a “consultant.”
  • She is responsible for perhaps the sleaziest campaign mailer seen since her own husband ran for the Assembly in 1995.
  • She has zero record on any issues. None. Zip. Zilch. Nada.

In sum, Mrs. Ackerman is a cipher, a virtual non-entity, trading on her husband’s name and hoping to succeed by raising enough money from her Sacramento pals to smear her opponent but good. And there you have it.

We will add as an addendum that it became clear during the Dave Lopez Mike Duvall/Linda Ackerman story that Dick Ackerman “speaks for his wife.” And that blatant puppetry ought to give any conscientious citizen cause to pause, especially when we learn that Ackerman is regarded as Mike Duvall’s “political godfather.”

And the desperate hit pieces on Chris Norby by Ackerman, Inc. and its big business and Redevelopment abuser surrogates has not only gotten slimier, but incessant. A new generation of North Orange Countians now knows how low Team Ackerman will go to keep its grubby mitts on power. Any power at all, really. 

Well, the voters have a clear choice. And in a democracy you always get the kind of representation you deserve!

Another Day, Another Phone Call

Oh, no. Not again!

Following hot on the heels of their last snagged conversation between Dick Ackerman and his various high-minded associates, we have received this sparkling gem from our Undercover Surveillance Unit.

It appears to be a conference call between Dick Ackerman and two of Repuglican OCs minor water bearers, Adam Probolsky and Matthew Cunningham. It is so unbelievable that we will obviously forgive you Friends for treating it as fiction, but here goes, anyway.

It's all coming together...another term in Sacramento!
It's all coming together...another term in Sacramento!

(Cunningham and Ackerman were already conversing when the interception began. A faint ringing sound is heard in the background)

Dick Ackerman: (snort) You missed the rear tires again.

Matt Cunningham: Sorry, sir. Thought I got them. Won’t happen again.

DA: (grunting noise) Yeah, well it better not…and use Armor All next time…

(ringing stops)

Adam Probolsky: Hey there, Senator. So glad I could join –

DA: (guttural sounds) Shut up and listen Problobsky. Your girlfriend has already got me into plenty of hot water. That shit with Jones Day isn’t going to be free.

AP: I’ll tell you what –

DA: (bark) No, you’re done talking, putz. Clam up. You’re almost as bad as that donkey Fleischman.

AP: Sorry, sir I just –

( a low grade snarl, unattributable)

DA: That asshole Lacy did a poll. Showed Linda down by ten. We go down, you go down. Now get your fat ass out there and refute it. And you, you –

MC: Me? Yessir?

DA: Your job is to screw with that FFFF operation and Bushala. That bastard is putting up signs attacking me. I mean attacking Linda. Nobody attacks me. It can’t be legal. They’re making me look bad. Making Linda look bad. Making us look bad. (several low growls and a snort). Ughhhmmmmph.

MC: He’s fringe. Crazy. I really hate him. I hate his guts.

AP: He’s a terrrorist. They all are, you know.

DA: Shut up, Plobrosky. What are you still doing on the line? You’ve got your assignment now get lost.

(a distinct clicking sound) 

MC: Anything else you want me to do, sir?

DA: (snarl) I want you to start going after Norby, goddammit!

MC: Okay….well…its hard…I mean. I haven’t endorsed him…

DA: (several growls)Nobody gives a rat’s ass about your punk endorsement. Just take a shit on him every day.

MC: Well, I’m trying, but you see, John is telling me the same thing, so –

DA: Don’t play hard ball with me you little (unintelligible). If I go down you’re coming along, too see, just like Porbolsky and Fleischberg. And all that Carona shit may come out, too. You and all your little…(loud sound of exhalation).  And don’t forget to shut up that Bartlett piece of crap. Thinks he’s so goddam pure and self-righteous. (growling sound)

MC: Well, we’ve been deleting some of his posts and Chip has –

DA: (muffled sounds of indeterminate origin) Shut him up. Now. I’ll take care of him but good after I win. So go after Bushala. Make him look bad. (several quick grunts)

MC: Well, it’s a little hard – he doesn’t seem to care what I say about him. He’s crazy.

DA: Goddamit, call him a liar and a crook. I don’t give a shit. Use some big words. Goddam Jones Day. Worthless. Can’t count on anybody. All out to get me. (a muffled snarl)

MC: Okay, sir. I’ll keep up the pressure. We really need Linda.

DA: Who? Oh, yeah. Right. Now start blogging or your gravy train’s gonna come to a screeching halt, you got it?

MC: Yessir!

DA: And next time get the tires right or I’ll let Fleischman do it.

Still Reeling From Methane Intoxication Fart Boy Can’t Clear Head

How come when I let fly with a salvo nobody salutes?
How come when I let one fly nobody salutes?

Over at his dreary and deserted Repuglican blog  Brown Klownty, minor grade GOPer lackey and Fart Boy Matt Cunningham accused FFFF of violating campaign finance laws. He showed pictures of NO ACKERMAN IRVINE CARPETBAGGER signs that he got from our site.

First, thanks Jerbal for the additional publicity for our blog; and also to the cause of running Ackerwoman out of Fullerton and back to Irvine. Oh, wait. We can’t do that BECAUSE THE STUPID CARTOON CUTOUT NEVER LEFT IRVINE!

I resemble that remark!
I resemble that remark!

What a maroon. It pleased Fart Boy to accuse FFFF of not making the necessary reporting on expenditures over a thousand dollars. First it doesn’t seem to have occurred to him that you can make signs for a lot less that he may imagine. But since he has no idea how many signs were even made he’s just making up shit and tossing it around again. Pretty low for the self-described model of character and virtue, but that’s the business he’s in.

The absolute funniest part is how he assumed that it was FFFF who failed to do the reporting! He portentously linked to the FFFF page at the Secretary of State’s website. It may come as a surprise to this pin head but the FFFF IE isn’t spending a dime in this election!

Not Quite Gone and Hardly Forgotten: Steve Greenhut Goes After Ackerman, Inc.

Our old amigo Steve Greenhut has taken a job up north in Sacramento to untangle some of the worst of California’s governmental pathologies, but he still writes an occasional piece for the OC Register. It obviously has not been lost on Steve that the current battle for the 72nd Assembly District is a pretty good symbol of an attempt by the entrenched GOP old guard to hold on to their influence and money apparatus – and that ties directly to the mess in Sacramento.

Over the week-end Greenhut dropped a devastating editorial scud on the Ackerman, Inc. machine that was both informative and entertaining. Read Steve’s piece here.

It first appeared as a small shadow from overhead...
It first appeared as a small shadow from overhead...

The OC Repugs don’t like the antiseptic light of day shining on their doings, so one can only imagine the consternation Greenhut’s editorial has caused. And they also don’t like their ideology questioned by anybody. Ideology is their purview, see, by which they whip up the stupider ranks of the rank and file and get them mobilized. But that’s mostly window dressing. When in office the ‘Pugs like to settle in and start milking their cash cow for all it’s worth.

It's so beautiful it just brings a tear to Dick's eye...
It's so beautiful it just brings a tear to Dick's eye...

Just a Lie. Or Two. Or Three. Or…

I grew my business in Fullerton! Well maybe it was carrots in the back yard. I know I grew something!
I grew my business in Fullerton! Well maybe it was carrots in the back yard. I seem to remember growing something in Fullerton!

We’ve already documented that Linda Ackerwoman is not, never has been (and probably never will be a “businesswoman”). And yet, here is her ballot designation:

I know, let's start our campaign off with two lies!
I know, let's start our campaign off with two lies!

Okay, the businesswoman thing is a bald-faced lie. Being a “consultant” to your husband’s political campaign is a great way to shift campaign contributions into your own pockets, but it hardly constitutes a business. Which leads to the second lie: “independent.” She is most certainly not independent. She has apparently never worked for anybody but her husband as a fund-raiser. That means she’s tied at the hip to all those lobbyists who put that $76,000 in her pocket. Not to mention all those lobbyists that facilitated the Hawaiian vacations – who laundered dough through a laughably named “Pacific Policy Research Foundation.” She’s about as independent as a barnacle stuck to the bottom of a boat.

It really makes you wonder about those people who have endorsed Ackerwoman, knowing that she’s about as much of a businesswoman as Daisy Duck.

Being a two dimensional cartoon is hard work!
Being a two dimensional cartoon is hard job. But is it a business?

Oh, that’s right! Those endorsers are also well aware that she doesn’t live in the district either. That tells you what kind of people they are. And come to think of it, that makes three lies!

FFFF Surveillance Team Snags Another Ackerman Call

Thye're back!
Yup. They're back!

Well they have done it again. Or at least they told us they did. Our crack Undercover Surveillance Unit has sent in a transcript of another intercepted Dick Ackerman phone conversation, this time with an unidentified male communicant. We are not sure exacly what to make of this transcript and we are cognizant that the surveillance team had just been issued its monthy medicinal marijuana supply. So we simply pass the transcript along to the Friends, who would be damn fools to believe it.

Heh heh. Remember the ferrets?
Heh heh. Remember the steamroom?

(Phone ringing)

Unidentified Male Communicant: Yes, hello.

Dick Ackerman: Tomski, Dick Ackerman here. (two quick grunts followed by a snort)

UMC: The Dickster! (unintelligible guttural sound)

DA: Booga, Booga!

UMC: Alpha Kappa

DA: Alpha Kappa Chi!

UMC: Grab some titties,

DA: Shoot some beaver,

UMC: I Eta Pi! (three or four grunts in quick succession) Heh. Heh heh.

DA: (Several snorting sounds and a distinct throat clearing) Heh heh heh.

UMC: What’s up Dickie-boy?

DA: (a grunt) Got some trouble up north with a punk reporter and a coupla pissant bloggers. Got a girl in trouble.

UMC: The Dickster! Oh yeah! Still got it! (two deep grunts). Heh heh.

DA: Not like that you idiot. More Duvall shit. God I wished I’d never talked that asshole into running. (a low, long rumbling sound)

Unidentified Female Voice In Background: She’s works so hard!

UMC: Uhhhmm…what do you want me to do?

DA: A coupla letters, heh heh. Pin some ears back, heh, heh, heh. The usual.

UMC: (a long rumbling throaty noise). Ahhh. Look Dickie-boy the suits back east are getting a little hung up on all this pro bono stuff. So…

DA: (a quick snarl) No, you look Tomski. We go back a long way. Remember the trouble with that senorita in Vallejo? And that little side deal during the Swindell merger? And the steam room. Remember the steam room, Tomski?

UMC: That was thirty-five years ago!

DA: Thirty-seven. But what’s a coupla years between old friends?

UMC: Ughhh.Ughhhh. Well…ughhh…

DA: Good. So we can count you in. Knew we could. I’ll fax over the dope. Get on it! (a grunt)

UMC: Yeah, well okay. See what we can do.

UFVIB: Dick, that white van’s back behind croquet court wall!

DA: (a string of nasal ejaculations followed by a quick barking sound) Okay, Tomski, gotta go. See you at the club on Friday!

UMC: (a grunting sound) Yeah. Okay. You owe me a drink!

(at this point the communication was ended)

Coming soon to your neighborhood...
Coming soon to your neighborhood...

God-awful “Fox Village” Gets Even Worse!

Remember those horror movies when the outraged villagers grabbed their pitchforks to have at the monster? What the “Fox Village” monster could use are a few more angry villagers.

At the City Council “workshop” on Tuesday the new plans for the existing city-created empty space behind the Fox Theater were rolled out. And while the reception by the public wasn’t pretty it wasn’t enough to kill off the monster, either.

What was rolled out were several elevations that raised the curtain on a hideously confused jumble of themes and materials that were supposed to be modernish, but that had that certain flavor of architectural renderings done by crazy people.

Egad. What a freaking mess...
Egad. What a freaking mess...

A hodgepodge of shapes and veneers with no apparent cohesion and not a whiff of aesthetic originality. Stone veneer on the first floor obligatory.

Oy Vey!
Oy Vey!

Have Fox Villagers gone insane? What a mish mash!

Say what?
Say what?

Why are they still trying to move McDonald’s? Didn’t the Council put that idea to rest? And yet here it is again! Can anyone say “insubordination”? Guess not – in Fullerton! And look a parking lot on the corner. Just what downtown needs – another permanent hole in the building fabric of downtown Fullerton.

Send in the clowns...
Send in the clowns...

Ah, the inevitable “pedestrian paseo.” Just lookit all the happy, bedazzled consumers. And that fountain! Precious. Makes you want to make a wish and toss three coins in.

Folks if you aren’t ready to go grab your pitchforks by now, we suggest that we stick a fork in you –  because we think you’re done.