In today’s Register our old amigo Martin Wisckol cobbled together a piece about, well, hard to say exactly what it was about, but among other things it contained some gems from OC Democratic Party boss Frank Barbaro.
Of course it's all bullshit!
It seems Frank is having buyer’s remorse after the singularly humiliating asswhipping Fred MacMurray had laid down on him by Chris Norby in the 72nd Special Election. Now, it seems Barbaro is wishing Sharon Quirk had stayed in the race.
“If we’d have had Sharon Quirk, I think we would have had a different result,” said Barbaro, a model of perseverance and optimism already looking ahead to the reelection Norby will seek later in the year. “We might have some surprises for him in November.”
Might have some surprises? Hell, the Sun might collapse in on itself, too.
To surprise Norby in November means the Dems have to have a credible candidate on board almost any day now. But who? Galloway now claims to live in the district, but is tied up elsewhere; Quirk-Silva? Maybe, but the last bug out seemed a bit, well, unusual. Hey, how ’bout Pam Keller? Nope; running for re-election. Rosie Espinosa? See Galloway comment, above.
So the Dems got nothin’. Just whistlin’ in the dark. All Norby has to do is make sure the mike is off.
Well Friends, here they are – the 2009 Fringie Winners. You don’t really deserve this sort of punishment inflicted on you, but…well, hell, maybe you do! The competition was spirited in many of the categories. And by spirited I mean mind-numbingly depressing. And I’m just a dog! I had to take long breaks several times during the nomination and judging to water the fire hydrants along Brea Boulevard.
It was like getting hit with a broomstick all over again...
1. In the category of Least Distinguished Journalist it really wasn’t even close. The OC Register’s Frank Mickadeit took it going away for his complete lack of journalistic integrity. In the end the judges just didn’t feel that Sharon Kennedy or Barbara Giasone even really qualified as journalists. Martin Wisckol was given credit for showing up on the blog even tho’ it was merely to defend his embarrassing whoring for Ackerman, Inc.
2. In the category of the Worst Bureaucratic SNAFU, the judges were clearly impressed by not only the scope of thePoisoned Park disaster and its ongoing potential for more o’ same, but by city staff’s ability to avoid any and all responsibility for the multi-million dollar mess. Bravo, Mr. City Manager, you’re finally catching up with your predecessor, and that’s saying a lot!
3.Worst Vote of 2009. Bankhead, Jones, and Kellerfor the win of course, with their undying support of the Redevelopment expansion. And by win, of course, I mean disastrous loss for everyone outside the Redevelopment Department.
4. In the category of Scariest Ghost of Fullerton Past, we had an eerily close call. Yet despite the frightening surprise visitation from my former broomstick-wielding mistress Jan Flory, the judges were absolutely horrified by the noxious vapor of Linda LeQuire, conjured up by Ackerman Inc. out of some fetid and accursed burial ground, to smear Chris Norby. It didn’t work, but it wasn’t for lack of trying.
5. In the category ofStupidest Statement Made in Publicwe again had a tough decision. In a year when Dick Jonessaid so many idiotic things and Pam Keller claimed (with a perfectly straight face) to be a “fiscal conservative,” a dark horse nominee grabbed the brass ring. And by dark horse nominee I mean the daffy, loud-mouthed nincompoop member of “Pam’s Posse”and her crazy-funny “why Pam should be mayor” rhetorical ramble through the brambles. Go ahead and watchit. We dares ya!
6. In the Government Small Change Adds Up category the award goes to the Roscoe’s Famous Nuisance Noise Study, a wonderful example of ill-conceived bureaucratic waste on a small scale that makes us really worried about the big stuff.
7. The Most Entertaining and/or Disturbing Image of 2009. Barney Wewak for the win. Aw, c’mon, was there ever any doubt? The picture even has a dog in it. Arf!
The Friends For Fullerton's Future Have Friends Around the World...
8. Best Vote 2009. This one was pretty easy for the judges since by the time they got around to this category they had inhaled copious amounts of medicinal weed acquired from the Dick & MaryJane Jones Dispensary. Our old friendSharon Quirk-Silvagets a double victory for seeing the proverbial light on the God-awful McDonald’s relocation; and also for opposing that fraudulent Redevelopment expansion.
9. Our final category is theMost Awful Political Candidate of 2009, and it goes to none other thanChris Norby for his abortive County Clerk campaign. Rarely had the judges seen such a blatant fixation on public sector job preservation and such a mismatch of skill set to position. The campaign slogan “Preserving Your Vital Records” was so insipid and so lame I have to lift my leg on it. Again. There. Clean up in aisle #9! Well deserved Fringie, indeed!
Finally, the Judging Committee decided to award three special Fringies in 2009 in order to recognize excessively, aesthetically unattractive behavior on the part of some of our political personalities.
10. Special Fringie #1. The call by Pam Kellerfor a City-run blog – with no bloggers – was such a wonderful monument to fatuousness and political tone-deafness that as a statement and an act it really was in a class by itself. You can enjoy our original post here and listen to Keller’s statement. Well done, Pam! You excelled yourself.
11. Special Fringie #2. Well of course we had to acknowledge Linda Ackerwomanwhose scampaign in the 72nd must be considered positively evil (yes the judges said evil!) by any normal person. This creature did not qualify in the most Awful Political Candidate category since the whole operation seemed more like a jail break than a campaign. Who knows how many hundreds of simoleons per vote this cipher and her Sacramento-organized goons wasted. Oh well. It least it wasn’t our dough!
12. Special Fringie #3. The judges believed that they would have been remiss without a tip o’ the Fringed cap to Congresscritter-for-life Ed Royce, the rat who managed to swim away from the giant suction-vortex of the sinking S.S. Ackerman and happily scampered up the waiting rope ladder onto the S.S. Norby. Well done little rodent!
And so friends, that concludes the 2009 Fringie Awards. We hope you have enjoyed them as much as we have enjoyed bringing them to you. And if you didn’t, tough.
Here’s looking forward to a new year filled with wonderful material from our favorite folks in Fullerton!
As you Friends may well imagine, this category is chock-full of worthy nominees. In fact, choosing them was a real challenge. 2009 was an excellent year for journalistic incompetence, and our nominees each qualified for slightly different reasons. The nominees for Least Distinguished “Journalist” are:
1. Sharon Kennedy. She is nominated for her reprehensible tactic of forwarding Chris Norby’s anti-Redevelopment essays on to City Hall, where a staffer wrote responses and Don Bankhead, between pudding breaks, signed them. Hardly the actions of a responsible journalist. Which is why we put the word in quotation marks in our title.
2. Barbara Giasone. Barbara distinguished herself last year by snagging the coveted Wurlitzer Prize. This year she earns a Fringie nomination by an entire year’s worth of vapid vacuity. Just think of it. The Earth has accomplished a full orbit of the Sun and Babs has not made a single journalist contribution to the folks of Fullerton. An accomplishment crying out for recognition.
3. Frank Mickadeit. This homunculus receives his nomination for outstanding and relentless ass-kissing of the Repuglican elite – formerly people like Mike Carona, but this year Ackerman, Inc., as he slavishly passed along all of Dick Ackerman’s bullshit to the dwindling number of OC Register readers.
4. Lastly, lets not forget Mickadeit’s Register colleague Martin Wisckol, who seems to suffer from the same sick infatuation with the Repuglican clique’s collective posterior that infects Mickadeit. This year Wisckol distinguished himself by acting as Ackerman, Inc. press agent, doing so from the very beginning of the Ackerwoman scampaign. Our intrepid reporter even contacted the Ackerwoman in France as soon as the Duvall deal went down. Later he passed along her lame “businesswoman” resume as a matter of fact, not invention. Suspicious minds smelled collusion. Suspicious minds were right.
The other day the Register’s number two press agent for the Repug Machine, Martin Wisckol wrote what he no doubt hoped would pass as a species of objective reporting, here. Yet somehow it fails the smell test, as might have been predicted.
Notice how Wisckol equates Norby’s pointing out that Ackerwoman is a carpetbagger (true!) with her campaign’s libelous misuse of court transcripts in a case that was dismissed by an appellate court! Martin unhelpfully points out how Ackerwoman did live in the 72nd District for a long time – a long time ago; as if anybody thought that was germane to the fact that SHE LIVES IN IRVINE NOW!
Notice too, how Wisckol passes directly along, without a shred of skepticism that Ackerwoman is some sort of “well versed” authority on water issues (of course he diligently omits reference to her MWD vote last spring to raise commodity costs to local water retailers by 20%). Typical. We remember how he swallowed whole her lie about being a businesswoman, here, and then actually tried to explain away his apparent credulity as some sort of reporter’s strategy.
Wisckol permits a delicious quote from Ackerwoman about all the hordes of ethically upstanding Repuglican electeds who have endorsed her (including her own husband – say, Dick, how’s that Fair thing working out?) without any mention of Norby’s endorsements – by Tom McClintock, for instance – a real conservative who’s worth all of the Ackerwoman’s RINOs put together – and then some.
We could go on and on, but why bother.
Fortunately, we’ve only got one day to go. And hopefully after tomorrow Martin and Frank can go have their Friday drinkies with the head ‘Pugs at Gulfstream without having to worry about writing any more press releases.
Of course if there’s a crashing defeat for Ackerwoman they may not even be invited anymore.
Ed Roski is friends with many famous dead Americans
Although we haven’t seen it, Martin Wisckol at the Register has posted a youtube clip of a cable TV run ad that basically paints Norby as some sort of anti-feminist monster. The thing is so hyperventilated that it’s hard to believe anybody would take it seriously. It starts out with an image of Mike Duvall that morphs into Norby. Only problem is by now voters have a pretty good idea that it was Dick Ackerman who selected and groomed Duvall in the first place, and even that Norby supported his opponent.
Wisckol claims the ad has been paid for by an independent expenditure of as yet unknown origin.
A strong whiff of Ed Roski Jr. is emanating from this garbage. Since the Alliance for California’s Tumors has stopped its work, Roski has undoubtedly discovered a new conduit for his torrent of slime. But this crap is bound to backfire just like all the other Ackerman slime seems to have done.
Friends, have you noticed the sudden subsidence of big glossy mailers sent out by Ackerman, Inc. and Alliance for California’s Tomorrow (ACT) attacking Chris Norby? You know, the ones that take uncorroborated testimony from a disgruntled ex-County employee fired for misfeasance and turned into third person language to make it look like somebody was a witness to her bogus claims?
We were getting pieces almost everyday (sometimes two) ladled out of the Ackerwoman slop-bucket, but that has stopped. Even Ackerwoman’s obsequious press agent Martin Wisckol has noticed it – and actually tried to figure out why. The ACT has run out of money. The last dough they spent went to a poll – and no more money has come in since.
Possible poll results that look bad for Ackerwoman, plus the fact that the majority of permanent absentee voters who are voting have already mailed in their ballots may well mean that the investment value in Ackerwoman’s candidacy has been reassessed.
So, have Ed Roski, the Indian casinos, and the other anti-Norby interests finally given up on the Ackerwoman campaign? Wisckol asked Jim Nygren, the parasite who runs ACT. Nygren said he was told to keep quiet. Apparently Roski doesn’t care for idle chatter.
Maybe the Register’s Martin Wisckol is worried about the impending collapse of his employer and is thinking about future work writing press releases for Dick and Linda Ackerman. Looks like he has already started.
Last Wednesday Wisckol tossed up this powder puff blog post addressing the issue of Linda Ackerman’s “experienced businesswoman” self-applied label. Exercising all the journalistic curiosity of a sea cucumber he coughed up this pearl:
God, I can't believe he bought that. Dick we gotta put that nice boy on the payroll...
Sorry Martin, but it’s not “good enough” just because she said so. To pass along this tripe suggests that you are either stupid, lazy, or are shilling for Ackerman, Inc. Since we assume the Register doesn’t knowingly employ overtly stupid people, the options are narrowed.
We’ll help out by citing our post that pretty effectively dispatches the Ackerman “experienced businesswoman” fable.
Let’s recap. Linda’s on the board of a collection agency, USCB; a job she got by virtue of her husband’s influence and that meets three or four times a year? That may provide a little extra pocket money, but it hardly constitutes what a reasonable person would call business experience.
She’s on the executive committee of the Marian Bergeson blah blah blah. A training ground for female GOP politicians. Another part-time gig base on her political connections. In any case her self proclaimed responsibility (from her own website) is “finance development” not “finance director”, ya chowder head. Development means calling up lobbyists and asking them for money. You know, Martin. The same lobbyists who lobbied her husband.
Likewise she got an appointment to the Board of the MWD – a political, not a professional appointment, Marty. Do you really think she would have gotten that without her husband’s name. So she goes to a government agency meeting once a month to be told how to vote. No business experience there, either.
A committee to restore the historic working spaces of the Capitol. WTF? Are you kidding, Martin? That sounds like business to you? To us that sounds like the bored wife of a legislator or a socialite, or both. There’s probably a real good reason there’s no website.
Well, Martin, we have just covered the sum and substance of Linda Ackerman’s “business” experience over her 45 years of adulthood. And here it is, again:
No real experience in the private sector
Never owned or operated a business
Never employed anybody
Never signed the front of a paycheck.
In fact, Linda Ackerman’s only real experience is raising money from lobbyists, for this or that personal Ackerman benefit, mostly her husband’s campaigns. And for that she was amply recompensed for her part time work. Come to think of it, we’re now pretty sure the woman has never even held a real job of any kind.
So come on Martin, how about a little real work yourself. Quit passing along Ackerman campaign mush gussied up as the truth. Why not try to do something honorable before you get the axe?
Just in case you needed any more evidence that the two Register political reporters/bloggers Martin Wisckol and Frank Mickadeit are anything other than tools in the Ackerman tool shed, observe this hard hitting piece by Wisckol in his GOP celebrity column, Total Buzz.
A “granny flat”! How quaint! Linda Ackerman is doing what the Ackerman’s seem to do best – mislead the public; here into thinking they’re actually renting an abode in Fullerton. She claims that she and Dick are renting three rooms, plus “kitchen privileges.” What a load of crap. Granny units have kitchens, Linda.
Instead Mrs. Ackerman is renting an address on Lindendale in order to legitimize a carpetbagging political campaign. Nobody, not even her camp followers believe she is living in the place.
The second funniest part of this sad lie is that she claims that renting an apartment is just soooo hard! How would she know? Did she actually try?
And the funniest part is how the sycophant Wisckol just passes along this tripe, all gussied up for credibility now that a “real” reporter has posted it. Note also that Wisckol says there is a “whisper campaign” that his dear Linda is carpetbagging. WTF?
Listen up Marty:
LINDA ACKERMAN IS AN IRVINE CARPETBAGGER!
Is that loud enough for you, Mr. Wisckol? And just in case you missed it:
We wouldn't be surprised if these started popping up along Chapman Avenue...
UPDATE: A WISE GUY COMMENTER MADE A SNIDE REMARK ABOUT THE SIZE OF THE IMAGE ABOVE. BUT RATHER THAN BE OVERLY SENSITIVE, WE HAVE UNCOVERED ANOTHER IMAGE THAT WE THOUGHTFULLY SHARE BELOW.
Is this better?
Well, it’s official. Linda Ackerman the wife of our former State Senator and Assemblyman, Dick, has decided to run in a special election to replace the Ackermans’ old pal, disgraced perv Mike Duvall, for the 72nd Assembly seat now vacated by the latter.
Mrs. Ackerman has a few things going for her, including a lot of contacts with big money and a husband who knows a lot of people; and she made it pretty clear to Martin Wisckol at the Register that she intends an amicable relationship with all those Redevelopment interests. She also has zero political record so that it would be pretty hard for an opponent to go negative on her record – she hasn’t got any. And as a woman – possibly the only woman on the Republican ballot – she could get a gender boost.
But she’s got some practical problems, too. First off, she doesn’t live in the 72nd District and although she doesn’t seem to think living in Irvine for the past decade is an encumbrance, we’re not too sure that many north countians won’t resent a carpetbagger. So she’s gotta move – presumably to Fullerton – and set up a temporary residence, at least through a primary. Second, her strength of no political record is also a liability: no experience either. Third, any ties with Duvall’s sordid 72nd career are bound to come out. Fourth, her opponent is none other than Chris Norby, a sitting County Supervisor who already has a lot of money in the bank and has pretty high name recognition in the district – in which he actually lives.
Behind all the ifs and buts is one solid truth. Mrs. Ackerman’s spouse detests Norby with a weird passion, and obviously sees his wife’s candidacy as an opportunity to do his enemy a bad turn. Ackerman went out of his way to endorse an unknown ribbon clerk for the County Clerk job when Norby had his eyes set on that dubious prize. And now Ackerman’s plan is perfectly transparent: suck up all of Norby’s money advantage in a special election primary for the 72nd, beat him, and then watch with satisfaction as a tapped out Norby is bested by a politcal novice for the Clerk job. Sayonara Norby, Sacramento here we come. Again.
Martin Wisckol over at the Register wrote about the possibility of Mrs. Linda Ackerman, wife of former State Senator, Assemblyman, Fullerton Councilman, and gerrymanderer par excellence , running in a special election to replace disgraced Mike “the Big Dripper” Duvall in Sacto. You can read about it right here .
Several thoughts spring immediately to mind. First, Wisckol reached Mrs. Ackerman while she and Dick were vacationing in France at the home of the Marquis de Sade. We’ll just let that one go except to add that that’s a pretty apt place to announce you’re might just replace Mike “Spanky” Duvall.
Second, Mrs. Ackerman doesn’t live in the district. She and Dick decamped a while back when his field of operations permitted him to move south. We don’t care for carpetbaggers even if they used to live here and we care even less for the spouses of politicos who trade on their mates political connections. Mrs. Ackerman’s political star has ascended in a not-so-curious trajectory, as her husband’s career wound down. She’s on the MWD board and that gives one cause to pause lately.
Third is the great irony of immediately placing yourself in the discussion about replacing a degenerate that was handpicked for office in the first place by your hubby and his “in crowd” GOP hacklings. Look how that one turned out!
Come on over to my ranch, and I'll tell you about the time I got famous.
Fourth, we read in Wisckol that Mrs. Ackerman claims she is conservative, but does not share Chris Norby’s anti-Redevelopment stance. In other words, she likes government intruding into local development and business, she likes affordable housing set-asides, she digs corporate subsidies, and she admires all the other big-government baggage that Redevelopment brings with it; hardly conservative at all, really. Well, hooray! Now we know what the Ackermans mean when they use the term conservative.
Finally, we note the possibility of a Norby-Ackerman rematch of the 1995 assembly election between Chris and Mrs. Ackerman’s husband, a spectacle in which Dick proved just how low he could go. Ackerman loathes Norby with a undisguised passion that has long since crossed over the threshold of obsession. Although the match would be highly entertaining, fulfilling a brain-dead family vendetta is a poor reason to do much of anything, let alone run for public office. Mrs. Ackerman should stay in Irvine.
